During times of stressful circumstances, you may find it difficult to defeat the negative thinking going on in your head. Worry, stress, anxiety can easily overtake us if we let it — especially now while the world is in such turmoil over the coronavirus.
Negative thinking needs to be dealt with before it becomes a crippling habit — making us only see the negative in every situation we face.
I found an excellent article on the subject of overcoming negative thinking from Melli O’Brien, Mrs. Mindfulness. Melli explains that dealing with negative thinking is not a quick fix formula, but she shares four keys to help eliminate this problem in her article …
THE FOUR KEYS TO OVERCOMING NEGATIVE THINKING…FOR GOOD
KEY ONE: Recognize & Step Back from Negative Thought Patterns… Once we learn to recognize and identify negative thought patterns as they occur, we can start to step back from them. This process of stepping back from thoughts is called ‘cognitive defusion.’ In cognitive defusion, we learn to see the thoughts in our head as simply that—just thoughts. Not reality. You see when we are fused with our thoughts (cognitive fusion) we tend to take our thoughts very, very seriously. We believe them. We buy into them and we obey them. We play them out. …
The problem is not that we have negative thoughts. The problem comes when we believe our thoughts are true. When you are no longer entangled in thoughts they lose their grip on you and lose their power to generate unpleasant emotions. …
KEY TWO: Coming to Your Senses
Notice that many negative thoughts mostly flow from two directions. The first is dwelling on the past—maybe you ruminate over mistakes, problems, guilt and anything in your life that’s did not go the way you believe it should have gone. The second is worrying about the future—fear of what may or may not happen for yourself, others or the planet. …
To become more present, and able to step out of negative thinking, one powerful method is to ‘come to your senses’. To do this simply redirect your attention out of the thoughts in your head and bring your focus to your sense perceptions. …
KEY THREE: Regular Mindfulness Practice
… It becomes easy for us to get more drawn into negative thinking the more we lose touch with ourselves in this way and lose ourselves in the mind. …
… Mindfulness is the practice of waking up to that wellspring of wholeness and peace. It’s waking up out of mind wandering (where we are lost in our heads, our old beliefs, habits, reactions and thinking patterns) so that we are able to live deliberately. Through mindfulness, we build our capacity to live from that deeper awareness and tame the mind. …
KEY FOUR: Helpful Questions for Unhelpful Thoughts
Some kinds of negative thinking patterns can be quite ‘sticky’. You may find that you try to ‘name it to tame it’ and come back to your senses but the thoughts continue to have a grip on you. If you find yourself in this position there are some further tools you can use to untangle from your thoughts and change your focus. …
Here are some questions you can ask yourself to help you untangle from the thought. You ask them and then you can answer them in your head. Usually, you would just pick one of these at any given time.
- Is this thought in any way useful or helpful?
- Is it true? (Can I absolutely know that it’s true)
- Is this just an old story that my mind is playing out of habit?
- Does this thought help me take effective action?
- Is this thought helpful or is my mind just babbling on?
Then you can (mentally) ask these questions below to create new focus and new possibilities. These questions will help you focus on constructive thoughts and actions and help you effectively face your day-to-day challenges and move towards living a more meaningful life. Again, you may only use of these at a time but you could always try more than one too.
- What is the truth? My deepest truth?
- What do I really want to feel or create in the situation? How can I move towards that?
- How can I make the best of this situation?
- Who would I be without this negative thought?
- What new story or thought can I focus on now?
- How can I see this in a different or new way?
- What can I be grateful for in this moment?
I highly recommend reading her full article — which includes a 14-minute meditation!
