In this ever-changing world, I learned a very valuable lesson in managing expectations. You know, when you think something is going one way, then it takes an abrupt turn in another direction — one that you totally did not expect.
I have found that my expectations often cloud my thinking rather than allowing life to unfold naturally. Sometimes these unexpected changes can throw me for a loop!
When expectations align with our perceived reality, they serve as springboards for defining our goals and desires. However, when they are unclear or unrealistic, they lead to frustration and disappointment. They can also create undue stress in our lives when left unchecked.
As I said, I learned a lesson about managing expectations this last week. I realized my stress level was rising, but I did not make the connection between what I was thinking and how I was feeling.
Someone did not act as I expected regarding a task I was performing. Once I found out that things did not unfold the way I expected, I felt like I totally lost my perspective! Honestly, and since I know better, I was totally taken off guard! Once I figured out what I allowed my mind to do, I stopped, took a breath (several ones, actually), and decided that good would eventually unfold in this situation.
In the meantime, I conducted some research and found some information on dealing with expectations. Here are some of the suggestions I found:
Take a moment to reflect on your core values—the principles and beliefs that truly matter to
you. Ask yourself:
- Does this expectation align with my values?
- If an expectation conflicts with your values, it may create unnecessary stress or distract you from
what’s most important in your life.- Is this expectation genuinely important to me, or is it shaped by external influences?
- Expectations can often come from societal norms, family pressures, or comparisons with others.
- Identifying whether they reflect your own priorities can help you let go of those that don’t serve you.
- How does this expectation support the life I want to create?
- If an expectation aligns with your goals and values, it can be a source of motivation. If it doesn’t, it
may need to be adjusted or reconsidered.- If these expectations do align with your values, are they realistic? What evidence supports or
challenges it?~ Complete worksheet here: https://www.carepatron.com/files/managing-expectations-worksheet.pdf
After a few days of inner searching, prayer and healing, I began to see good emerge from my shattered expectations.
This was a good lesson for managing my expectations in the future.